Weekends are for weddings! If you’re like me, with 9 weddings each year, the weekends are, quite literally, for weddings (attending them, that is). Also if you’re like me, the weekend is a time to think about planning your own wedding. Lots of people carve out a certain time each week for to wedding planning (Wedding Wednesday seems to be very popular). It ensures the wedding doesn’t take over their whole lives; however, I find that confining wedding planning to a specific time is too pressure-filled and bicker-prone. I plan my wedding when inspiration strikes. Weekends, in particular, offer the time to let my mind roam and plan my own wedding in a stress-free environment. In this series, I’ll take you through some of my major planning steps – hopefully this will help you plan your own wedding!
My beau and I are lucky to have some adorable nieces and nephews in our lives. My two nephews are also my godsons and I really wanted to incorporate them in some way. It was a no-brainer to make Brooks our ring bearer. So cute in that little seersucker suit! But his little brother, Reed, just turned 1 right before the wedding. That’s too young to go down the aisle. Even if he was being pulled in a wagon (adorbs), with a wedding that starts at 6:30, he would likely be too cranky when it was go time. I’ve seen too many ring bearers start crying just as it was time to walk down the aisle. Rather than get stressed out right before the biggest moment of our lives, we made the decision about a year out that he would be in the pics but not serve as ring bearer. The same went for Albert’s niece, Delaney, who also just turned 1 a mere eight days prior to Reed. In the end, I think this was actually a relief to the parents, wedding planner, and all involved, who didn’t have to worry about whether their young kids would cooperate.
Here’s the thing about little kids: stuff is bound to go wrong. My sister in law asked what I wanted Brooks to wear for his ring bearer outfit and I requested a seersucker suit. I also said it could be cute if Reed coordinated, but not necessary to buy a full suit he was bound to soon outgrow. It was adorable how cute they looked, but Reed got sick about two days before the wedding and we just couldn’t torture a sweet sicky boy by making him wear suit pants. He wore jeans and it was no big deal. Also no big deal? If Brooks didn’t go down the aisle at all. I knew having a 2.5 year old as a ring bearer was risky. I have been to so many weddings where the ring bearer or flower girl gets fussy and the bride gets upset. I said from the get go that if Brooks looked like he wasn’t having fun, he wouldn’t have to do it – no harm no foul.
HOT TIP #1: Go into the situation with low expectations. Assume a child’s name might be in the program but not go down the aisle. In the end, I really didn’t care. People said I was being “so chill” about it, but really I just wanted one less thing to stress about.
HOT TIP #2: Don’t be above bribery. To coax Brooks down the aisle, we made sure he saw his Papa was at the other end with a brand new shiny truck. We also stationed Nana at the entrance to feed him gummy bears before walking down with the promise of more once he got to the end. It worked.
Albert also has a goddaughter, and he is close with her and her two sisters. They were too old to serve as flower girls, but we wanted them to feel special so I invited them into the city for a girls day about six weeks before the wedding. We had lunch at Serendipity, got a sugar fix at Dylan’s Candy Bar, and went to Bloomingdales to buy dresses they could wear to the wedding. Even though they weren’t in the wedding, I wanted to make sure they got to have some sort of bonding experience that would make them feel connected to the event in some way.
Take it from the youngest sibling/cousin in the fam: whenever a couple includes you in their wedding plans, whether it’s with an honor, pictures, or a shopping experience, it makes all the difference. It makes you feel so special and who doesn’t want to feel special?